I had to turn the big “3-0″ on the road — isolated from friends and family. To make things special, Rachel challenged me to a buffet of 30 objectives to complete.
From “Get Wet” to “Visit the Playground,” and “Have a ‘Kony 2012′ public meltdown,” we ran all over God’s creation to complete these since we woke at the crack of noon.
Friends and family back home could follow and comment along live on Facebook, some even did before unsubscribing from me for good around Challenge #17!
The day started off simply enough — I had to “Shave the Beard, but Keep the Mustache.” It seemed reasonable since novelty mustaches have been all the craze. However, I just looked creepy. I seriously thought I was going to molest myself.
Rachel wanted me to “Stop and Smell the Roses” while showing off those rosy cheeks.
I don’t know if Bananas Fosters French Toast counted for the “Have a Fancy Dessert” challenge, so I ate it with a pinky in the air for an additional daintiness factor.
I was supposed to “Commune with the Animals” but this was as close as I could get before having to run away and duck for cover.
In an attempt to keep things topical, I had to “Have a Kony 2012 Public Meltdown” in the park. It was really quite liberating and I highly recommend it.
“Get Wet” was a fun challenge, especially after I was in the clear of not getting arrested, nor catching leptospirosis.
I had to “Write a Letter to the Aliens” – I was hoping for Vulcans, but preparing for ALFs.
You’re never too old to “Visit a Playground” but you can be too fat for the swing. I was praying to God those tiny chains would hold and my ass was totally squished together by that unforgiving rubber seat.
“Rolling Down a Hill” is a simple pleasure I’ve enjoyed since the time I realized it doesn’t hurt so bad if you take everything out of your pocket first. Unfortunately, this 6″ tall mound was the tallest hill we’ve seen since entering this time zone.
A favorite challenge was to “Put on a Hot Pair of Underwear.” These beauties were in the dryer for like an hour before I slipped them on. Nice n’ toasty.
A reasonably easy challenge, “Make a Toast.” I think I was saying something like, “Take the picture already.”
All in all, the challenges were very fun to try and complete and I ended the day exhausted and quite a happy fellow. Next year, I’ll settle for a “Princess Cake” and a “Tabatha Takes Over” marathon on Bravo.